I'm sure that you have seen the incredibly sad news that has been circulating within the media over the last couple of days, it's been heartbreaking to read. As a modern society we have some many opportunities to show kindness and be supportive. Yet here we are. I didn't know much about Caroline Flack, but one thing I know for certain is that the British tabloids are toxic. I'm disgusted and appalled at the media and their treatment of this woman. Whatever the situation and whatever the outcome would have been, a woman took her own life.
In a forward thinking society it seems as if it's completely acceptable and a public right to tear someone down, to humiliate and attack them in the media because of the life they choose. It's not acceptable, it's not ok and it's certainly not our public right. There are people that think attacking others on social media somehow makes them powerful. That bombarding people with derogatory comments, spiteful insults, or inconsiderate memes is harmless.
Being in the public eye does not mean you are immune to feelings or suffering. At the end of the day are all human. We casually destroy people with our judgement, criticism and thoughtless but vicious words. Social media has awakened something awful that seems to growing with hatred each day. Our words have consequences. So please before you write any words, just think for a moment before publishing. We are all just trying to get by and we need to be far more understanding rather than prejudging a situation that most of us probably wouldn't understand.
That same media that tore her apart professionally and personally are the same as those now writing the articles of her passing. It's appalling. How many more wake up calls does it take for the world of the media to realise what they are doing is wrong. What ever the situation was or whatever the outcome would have been, a woman took her own life. Whether she was guilty or not. The media already made their decision. They ruined her life, to the point where she felt she has no one and no other option but to take her own life.
As a blogger, I have experienced hateful comments about me, my content and my life choices. I have had comments published about me that have really affected my mental health. But thankfully for me I was surrounded by great friends and supportive family that were there for me. It's so heartbreaking that Caroline had no one to reach out to, or those that she did, thought she was burden. No one should ever feel that taking their own life is the only option they have.
So much more can be done to prevent this from happening again. Ultimately there should definitely be stricter laws around safeguarding those people in the public eye. To protect their mental health and their human rights are ensure that they are being respected. Changes need to be made for those people taking their own lives because of the media twisting their stories. Just because someone is famous doesn't mean that they should be treated any different than any other normal person. But laws alone aren't going to be enough, we have to make changes too. Our 'cancel culture' is appalling and brutal. Before we write things about others we really need to take the time to sit and think about the consequences of our words. Words are harmful, word can destroy someone. So in a world where we can be anything, always, always be kind.
*In the UK and Ireland, Samaritans can be contacted on 116 123 or email jo@samaritans.org or jo@samaritans.ie. In the US, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 1-800-273-8255. In Australia, the crisis support service Lifeline is 13 11 14. Other international helplines can be found at www.befrienders.org.*
Jon Ronson wrote a book 'So you've been shamed publicly online'. It's worth reading, for parents, to get an idea of quite how out of control this can get. And also be mindful of our part in it. Good post #KCACOLS
ReplyDeleteEveryone should live by the title of your post #kcacols@_karendennis
ReplyDeleteEveryone should live by the title of your post #kcacols@_karendennis
ReplyDelete"It's so heartbreaking that Caroline had no one to reach out to, or those that she did, thought she was burden." I'm not sure that this is true? Everything I have read suggests she had a very supportive family, friends that were caring for her right up until the moment she died. Her boyfriend was not allowed by law to contact her but was clearly worried and knew she needed constant support.#KCACOLS.
ReplyDeleteit's so easy for people to hide behind their online profiles now. it's damaging and there needs to be more accountability. Tbh as a blogger I tend not to write anything particularly inflammatory or with regards to my opinions on things. I just can't be bothered with online arguments and debates. #KCACOLS
ReplyDeleteIt really is so awful - I don't know how people think it is okay to attack each other from behind their keyboard. Lets hope we can teach our children to respect one another and be kind #KCACOLS
ReplyDeleteThis is all so true. My favourite quote will always be "If you can't say anything nice, say nothing at all" but unfortunately social media isn't like that! #KCACOLS
ReplyDeleteSo many people hide behind the "anonymity" of a keyboard. We should all be decent human beings.
ReplyDelete#KCACOLS
I sat through a very interesting talk at the weekend about Metal Wellbeing in the workplace, so amny of these issues came up. We need to take it seriously #KCACOLS
ReplyDeleteIt is so awful that anyone is bullied by one person let alone by hundreds over several years. Kindness costs nothing but is the most valuble thing we can give. #KCACOLS
ReplyDeleteWE can only hope it makes people think before posting nasty comments. But the law has to be stricter too, and the host sites better at tracing hate posts #KCACOLS
ReplyDeleteI totally relate to this and you've echoed my own sentiments on this whole issue. It takes nothing to be kind to someone - I can't fathom how people and the press can be so cruel. I've also experienced negativity with my blogging, vlogging and instagram too. People can be so horrid. We all need to be a little bit nicer x #KCACOLS
ReplyDeleteI genuinely think people see trolls as the people sending death threats. But actually sometimes the more harmful online behavior is the unsolicited 'helpful' comments. When a celeb puts a picture of them with their baby and gets inundated with comments about not holding the baby like that, or the baby needs to be wearing something warmer. It must make you doubt yourself.
ReplyDeleteOops #KCACOLS
DeleteI think so many people are happy to say things behind the safety of their keyboard that they wouldn't say to someone's face. We all need to learn that the impact of our cyber comments can be just as hurtful as our real life comments. #KCACOLS
ReplyDeleteI hadn't heard anything about this case or the people involved but I definitely agree with your post. Why do people need to be so mean? I don't even know if stricter regulations are possible but in an ideal world they shouldn't be necessary. Maybe this is something we should start educating kids about from a young age - the importance of being kind and considering how other people feel. #kcacols
ReplyDeleteThis is in part why I rarely read 'news papers' anymore, online or in physical form. They're often so full of stories about what this or that 'celebrity' has been up to, and often it is scandalising and intrusive, and much of what is stated is untrue as well as hurtful.
ReplyDeleteI didn't actually know much about Caroline Flack in particular before she died, and from what I've heard she was mostly famous for presenting Love Island, which I thing makes the whole thing even more complex. Those type of programs are themselves part of the media circus and click bait culture, I think... And I can't see any of it being helpful when it comes to building a positive mental health culture. It's all quite a mess, sadly, isn't it? xx #KCACOLS
All this does make me worry for my kids when they're old enough to be online - hopefully lessons will be learnt #KCACOLS
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