For Amelia On Your Third Birthday

To my beautiful little lady, 

I’ve been putting off writing this letter to you, refusing to believe that my baby girl is no longer a baby at all and in the blink of an eye, you are three. You are now my little girl! I’m not sure how it’s already been three years since you made your entrance into this world. Three years of morning snuggles. Three years of staying home with you. Three years of lots of books and kisses goodnight. Three years talking with your dad about how much of a light you are in our lives. Three years have passed by so quickly and they’ve been the best three years of my life.

Becoming a mother was something that I never thought was possible, but we were blessed with you beautiful baby girl. The minute you were born I felt a love like no other, you brought some much joy and love into my heart and I didn't think it possible that my heart could be more full. But, I was wrong and as time passes as I watch you continue to grow, so does my heart. The night you were born, in some ways I feel as if I born, being your mother was something that I was just meant to be. You give me a meaning to my life. I'm not sure why, but I am finding myself in your room, watching you, watching you sleep and listening to those little noises you make when you're sleeping. It makes me smile every time. I cannot actually remember the last time I did this, it just feels so perfect watching you sleep. But as I watch you sleep, it takes me back to our first night together. You made your entrance into the world and we were moved to the maternity ward, we thought your first night would be at home as a family of three, but it was not. I had to watch your dad walk away from me, from you all on his own. It was absolutely heart breaking. But it was just us, all alone behind that curtain in the cubicle. I was so scared but you were so perfect. I just stared at you like I am right now and thought about all the memories we were yet to create. But neither of us were quite sure of what we were doing, but both so filled with love that nothing else would ever matter again.

The first night was so surreal. You were finally in my arms and I remember feeling so overwhelmed but I was so grateful that I was finally holding you baby girl. I knew that I would try my hardest to be the best mother I could be, but that first night I struggled. I was feeling so scared. I felt as if I couldn't do it without your Dad. But I just stared at you and it was then that I knew that everything was going to be alright, we had each other. I will forever be grateful that we were blessed with such a beautiful baby girl, you were so wonderful and I was completely in love with you. I know that this will grow as you continue to amaze me. 

After our first night together I just wanted to focus on getting you home so we could be a family of three. We settled you into your car seat, ready to take you out to see the world. I walked out that hospital with your Daddy bursting with pride and so in love. It was quite overwhelming at times, as we were yet to discover what was in store for us as we ventured into the unknown that is parenthood. But I remembering thinking on our journey home that I was one of the lucky ones, I was a mother now and I am now responsible for you, even that moment I was so aware that it was my job to protect you. Our journey home was less than five minutes but it took use nearly 20 minutes driving 10mph constantly checking if you were breathing. Something I still do now and you're three!

The past three years have not been the easiest, it's been a rollercoaster. We've had great moments, bad moments and awful moments. There were times where I didn't think I would be able to see a positive light, but you my beautiful girl, would smile and it was that smile that I knew that everything would be alright. As a mother I have learned to survive bad moments because of you, which has actually made me appreciate all those great moments and make them amazing. You fill me with the same feelings of pride that I felt that first night in the hospital and every single moment with you will be amazing...

It's only just now as I sit and write this that it's hit me how independent you have become. You don't need me for everything anymore, and that's so hard. I thought that parenting would get easier, I guess in some ways it has, but sometimes I miss those days when you couldn't do anything without me. This is all going to get harder, as you'll be going to pre-school in September and as exciting as it will be for you, I feel as if it's an end to something. I know I will cry like a baby when I leave you for the first time, but I know you will be fine. Seeing you grow into a well-mannered, kind-hearted person, being a social butterfly all on your own, developing your own identity, your own laugh, annoying fake laugh, a great imagination and ambition to try to do everything yourself. I love the little girl you have become, but could you slow down a little? 

I never knew how much being a mother would change me. It's pretty amazing how one little person and the love I have for her has brought a new meaning to every moment. What once seems so important, now feels insignificant. It's like I get to see the world for the first time again, but through someone else's eyes. It's a beautiful and an amazing thing to experience. My beautiful little girl, you have already made me the happiest and most fulfilled mother in the world. The night you were born, I was born too, I became the person that I was always supposed to be. You gave my life meaning and purpose in a way I didn’t know was possible. I love you so much sweetheart...

Happy birthday my little lady xxx


  1. I was sure I'd let a comment already, but sometimes on my phone it gets swallowed up! So a belated Happy Birthday Amelia. I hope you had a fantastic day. You are so lucky your Mummy has written such a beautiful piece for you, and one day you will look back and feel so special because you have this to read xx

  2. Oh what a beautiful piece of writing for your daughter. I'm sure that she will cherish this when she is older and looking back on her birthdays. It goes so fast. I hope that Amelia had a lovely birthday xx

  3. Oh wow, what a beautiful and emotional post, really did touch me. Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope you come back again next time