Welcome back to another instalment of The Baby Feeding Series, where we spotlight real stories from real parents navigating the messy, emotional, and often confusing journey of feeding their babies. My hope is that this space becomes a comforting corner where others who feel lost or overwhelmed can read these experiences and feel a little less alone. Parenthood is hands-down the toughest role out there, but it’s also the most beautiful. Through these stories, I want to honour both the struggle and the joys.
Last week, the lovely Becki from The Mum in Brum shared some fantastic tips for bottle-feeding parents—it's such a shame I didn't have her list when my daughter was born; it would have saved me so much time. This week, I'm excited to introduce my friend and talented blogger Susie from This is Me Now. She wanted to write a post about a toddler's understanding of breastfeeding, and I was intrigued to see what she came up with. So, without further ado, over to Susie!
BREASTFEEDING AND MY TODDLER
When I look back on mine and my daughters feeding “journey” (cringe, hate that word), I feel pretty lucky. Then I think, don’t feel lucky, you worked bloody hard to make that happen! It was by no means an easy task…
I can’t really remember the first feed all that well, but what I do remember is a midwife coming and squeezing my boob and sucking up colostrum with a syringe and putting it into my baby’s mouth. Then when my husband left later that night, I was all alone and my baby wouldn’t latch on. I had to ask the midwives to help throughout the night and all the next day. After no sleep and being told I couldn’t go home until I’d fed her I got extremely upset. I remember sobbing on a midwife saying “she doesn’t like me!” I was exhausted from two days of no sleep and being on a noisy ward. After more tears and a third night in hospital I’d finally managed to feed my baby and we were allowed home.
The rollercoaster of emotions didn’t stop there though. I was so sore and she lost more weight when she should have been gaining it and we were very nearly forced to give formula by the community midwives. Then those same midwives spotted that she wasn’t feeding well and had a possible tongue tie. We were lucky and only had to wait a week or so before having that snipped. That, plus multiple visits from my NCT breastfeeding counsellor, really saved us. After three or four weeks it all got a lot easier and we enjoyed so many days feeding, having snuggles, watching TV boxsets and getting into our feeding groove. She wasn’t a sicky baby and despite a brief biting stage (OUCH!!) she fed very well. I fed her until she was just 18 months old and she pretty much self weaned.
Fast forward nearly a year, and my toddler is still interested in the boob, but in a naturally inquisitive way. I have friends who are breastfeeding and she fully understands what boobs are for. If she sees a friend or even a stranger breastfeeding, she says “Mummy, baby having the milk!”. She knows babies are fed that way. At first when she started vocalising her knowledge in public, I cringed and thought “sssssh!!” But I have been met with smiles from both my friends and those well meaning strangers.
For a while she’s been pulling my top, having a good look and saying “boobies!” then laughing, usually as I say “yes, Mummy’s, put them away, leave them alone…” Now, if she looks down my top she says “boobies! for milk!” She knows she no longer needs the milk, but she still knows that is what they are for.
And when we went to see some baby lambs recently, she saw lambs feeding. “Mummy, baby sheep having the milk!” She could tell they were having milk even before I told her. It got me thinking that actually, I’m proud she knows what it’s all about. It’s human nature. No, I’m not saying it’s for everyone, and I’m not saying it’s easy. But it is natural.
She has a toy baby which we bought her for Christmas and it came with a bottle of milk. When she first played with it she enjoyed giving the baby it’s bottle. I have, some months later, been given said baby, and asked to give it milk. As in, pretend to breastfeed a plastic doll. Hmm, what is one to do in this situation, I thought? Should I say no, and say the baby’s got a bottle? Or should I be comfortable with her wanting her baby to be breastfed? I did cringe, and I did say, the baby can have a bottle. But I also said “or does the baby want milk from the boobie?” And yep you guessed it she said “boobie”. So yes, let’s add it to the list of things I thought I’d never do… I pretended to breastfeed a baby doll!
It get’s better - a few days later, I watched her pick it up and hold it to her chest and pretend to feed it! But, as I stood there, I didn't say anything. I sort of reluctantly, got over the feeling of embarrassment. I let my inner “is this weird?” question go. I let her be. I mean if we’re supposed to encourage women to breastfeed, what is the point of hiding it from children?
So yes, some people might find it a bit odd, but I think it’s lovely that my toddler understands what boobs are for, and how babies are fed.
I can’t really remember the first feed all that well, but what I do remember is a midwife coming and squeezing my boob and sucking up colostrum with a syringe and putting it into my baby’s mouth. Then when my husband left later that night, I was all alone and my baby wouldn’t latch on. I had to ask the midwives to help throughout the night and all the next day. After no sleep and being told I couldn’t go home until I’d fed her I got extremely upset. I remember sobbing on a midwife saying “she doesn’t like me!” I was exhausted from two days of no sleep and being on a noisy ward. After more tears and a third night in hospital I’d finally managed to feed my baby and we were allowed home.
The rollercoaster of emotions didn’t stop there though. I was so sore and she lost more weight when she should have been gaining it and we were very nearly forced to give formula by the community midwives. Then those same midwives spotted that she wasn’t feeding well and had a possible tongue tie. We were lucky and only had to wait a week or so before having that snipped. That, plus multiple visits from my NCT breastfeeding counsellor, really saved us. After three or four weeks it all got a lot easier and we enjoyed so many days feeding, having snuggles, watching TV boxsets and getting into our feeding groove. She wasn’t a sicky baby and despite a brief biting stage (OUCH!!) she fed very well. I fed her until she was just 18 months old and she pretty much self weaned.
Fast forward nearly a year, and my toddler is still interested in the boob, but in a naturally inquisitive way. I have friends who are breastfeeding and she fully understands what boobs are for. If she sees a friend or even a stranger breastfeeding, she says “Mummy, baby having the milk!”. She knows babies are fed that way. At first when she started vocalising her knowledge in public, I cringed and thought “sssssh!!” But I have been met with smiles from both my friends and those well meaning strangers.
For a while she’s been pulling my top, having a good look and saying “boobies!” then laughing, usually as I say “yes, Mummy’s, put them away, leave them alone…” Now, if she looks down my top she says “boobies! for milk!” She knows she no longer needs the milk, but she still knows that is what they are for.
And when we went to see some baby lambs recently, she saw lambs feeding. “Mummy, baby sheep having the milk!” She could tell they were having milk even before I told her. It got me thinking that actually, I’m proud she knows what it’s all about. It’s human nature. No, I’m not saying it’s for everyone, and I’m not saying it’s easy. But it is natural.
She has a toy baby which we bought her for Christmas and it came with a bottle of milk. When she first played with it she enjoyed giving the baby it’s bottle. I have, some months later, been given said baby, and asked to give it milk. As in, pretend to breastfeed a plastic doll. Hmm, what is one to do in this situation, I thought? Should I say no, and say the baby’s got a bottle? Or should I be comfortable with her wanting her baby to be breastfed? I did cringe, and I did say, the baby can have a bottle. But I also said “or does the baby want milk from the boobie?” And yep you guessed it she said “boobie”. So yes, let’s add it to the list of things I thought I’d never do… I pretended to breastfeed a baby doll!
It get’s better - a few days later, I watched her pick it up and hold it to her chest and pretend to feed it! But, as I stood there, I didn't say anything. I sort of reluctantly, got over the feeling of embarrassment. I let my inner “is this weird?” question go. I let her be. I mean if we’re supposed to encourage women to breastfeed, what is the point of hiding it from children?
So yes, some people might find it a bit odd, but I think it’s lovely that my toddler understands what boobs are for, and how babies are fed.
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About Susie
Susie, originally from York but is now living in Norfolk with her lovely husband Matt. The have a daughter, Miss Belle who is two years old. Susie loves to write about her family life, days out, and about those moments where you pull your hair out and those moments where you feel so happy you could burst. Susie has become a bit of a foodie and so she has started to add some recipes and foodie posts into her blog too. So please don't forget to go and visit her on her blog.
You can find Susie over at This is Me Now
Ah thanks for having me take part in your fab series x
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