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MOTHERHOOD MONDAYS | I would love to hear your stories

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My daughter will be turning two and a half on Christmas day and I cannot actually believe it, how can this be? Its been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster for all of us, we've laughed, we've cried and even played with toys at 4am in the morning. We have watched her through the milestones and created so many great memories as a family of three. I know it's what everyone says as they watch their babies grow up, but time really does fly by...

Due to being such an emotional prat, please tell me that I am not the only one? I thought that it would be a perfect time to begin a mini series on the blog, featuring real stories from those who have experienced how tough, rewarding and confusing motherhood can be. After all its the hardest job in the world. I would love to hear your stories whether they are good, bad or ugly, please message me and share your stories for Motherhood Mondays!


 

Let's kick off the first post of the series about my journey into motherhood.

This next part of this post has been in my drafts for some time and I have been in two minds whether to share this part of my life on my blog . I would read the post over and over and steer clear of that publish button, however today for some reason or another I wanted to share this part of me.

I have said it before on the blog nothing can really prepare you for being a mother. You can read all the books, attend antenatal classes and listen to the vast amounts of advice, but when it comes down to it you never really know what it's like to be a mother until you are one. For me, becoming a mother has been one of the biggest accomplishments that I have made and probably will ever make in my life. Any decisions that I have made have never brought me so much joy and so much love into my heart. I'm pretty sure many will be with me on this one when I say that I thought I knew what is was to love another, but being a mother is a love like you have never known. An unconditional love, a love that's impossible to break. But our journey into parenthood has by far not been the easiest.

In order for you to understand I need to take you briefly back. I promise it will be brief. Ever since I can remember I have always been at the doctors, the hospital or seeing specialists at one time or another. I cannot tell you the amount of times I have had to show people me down belows, one time there was at least five doctors down there having a gawk. As I'm sure you can imagine, it was terrifying for a young girl. All these appointment were for a reason, right up until the age of sixteen I would have random bleeding patterns from my down belows, which was a cause for concern for my parents and the doctors. But after all these appointments there wasn't much that they could advise until I began puberty and my menstruating cycles, which wasn't until I was sixteen.

Back in the same old room, legs akimbo, doctors having a gawk, scans and more tests we finally got some answers. I was told that both my ovaries were extremely small and that they weren't developing as they should. Then he went onto say that it would be very difficult for me to conceive naturally, when the time comes. At sixteen years old, children were the furthest thing from my mind but I knew I wanted to be a mother with out a doubt, but not yet. However as I got older and everyone around me started to have their own families, my thoughts led me back into that doctor's office. I began to convince  my family, friends and myself that I didn't want children and this would be the best way not to show that part of me, but while I was holding their babies, it broke my heart as I knew that this may never be me.

This was also the same time my husband came into my life. Ssssh don't tell him but I knew pretty much straightaway that he was the one for me and we soon became attached at the hip. I knew that it was getting serious between us and it would only be fair to him to tell him that I may never be able to have children of my own. After a long time building up the courage to tell him he was just perfect and told me that we would concentrate on building a life together and deal with that side of things when the time comes. Life was pretty busy after that. I graduated, my husband completed his engineering degree, we moved out of our parents. We got engaged and finally we got married.  We enjoyed holidays, spending our spare cash on whatever we wanted, enjoyed lay ins and arranging things on a whim. It was such a wonderful time.

Then the questions began...when are you starting a family? Ooh isn't time you had a baby? Is there a bun in the oven? Obviously we wanted to start a family but nobody knew that part about us. One negative test after another, it was disheartening and I think it's because deep down we knew becoming parents may never happen for us. Our future in becoming parents was bleak and we decided to stop because trying for a baby was the only thing we were focusing on and it had taken it's toll on us and our marriage. We began focusing on us again, trying to discover what we wanted to do with our lives and then something amazing happened. I was incredibly fortunate to become pregnant with our daughter Amelia, a true blessing that I would never ever taken for granted. I just stared at the positive pregnancy test trying to comprehend what I was seeing. I was finally going to be someone's mummy.
 

The only way that I can end this post is to say, be thankful and appreciate the things we have in life and remember whenever we meet new people to stop and think that they could be fighting a battle that you know nothing about, so be kind!

If you'd like to be part of the series then please feel free to send me an email to mimiroseandme@gmail.com  and I'd be thrilled to get back to you with more information! Please get in touch even if you don't have a blog and you would simply like to share your story.

2 comments on "MOTHERHOOD MONDAYS | I would love to hear your stories"
  1. Oh wow this is really moving. It's true, we never really know what someone is going through. I can't imagine how hard that must have been before you conceived. Glad you've got your little ray of sunshine now though! Would be interested in taking part, I'll have a think and email you xx

    ReplyDelete
  2. A very heart felt and moving post xx

    ReplyDelete

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