Welcome back to another instalment of The Baby Feeding Series, where we spotlight real stories from real parents navigating the messy, emotional, and often confusing journey of feeding their babies. My hope is that this space becomes a comforting corner where others who feel lost or overwhelmed can read these experiences and feel a little less alone. Parenthood is hands-down the toughest role out there, but it’s also the most beautiful. Through these stories, I want to honour both the struggle and the joys.
This week in The Baby Feeding Series, we’re delighted to welcome the lovely Rachael from Rachael Claire, who’s sharing her breastfeeding journey with us. One of the things I love most about this series is how each story brings something unique no two experiences have been the same, and Rachael’s journey is no exception. I’m so grateful she chose to open up about her not-so-straightforward experience with Teddy. So, without further delay, I’ll hand you over to Rachael and her beautifully honest account.
MY BREASTFEEDING JOURNEY
After Teddy's long and not-so straightforward birth (that you can read about my labour and delivery story here) lasting 55 hours and ending up in theatre with a forceps delivery, I was excited to get things going and try breastfeeding him. Once I had been stitched up (yummy..) and wheeled through to recovery, the midwife helped me to try and get him to latch on, almost an hour later and we were still there... I tried every position, switching boobs.. he just wasn't having it at all. He was so tired and just wanted to sleep. That went on for around 24 hours!
Our first night in hospital was spent with a midwife coming in every three hours to try and get him to feed, he just point blank refused. It ended up where I had to hand express and the midwife had to syringe the colostrum up and then syringe it into Teddy's mouth. I was so upset and disappointed that it wasn't going as straight forward as everyone had made out it could be..'oh my baby latched straight away.' Well that isn't always the case, however I was determined not to give up and 24 hours later he suddenly latched on like he had been doing it all along, and he's been there ever since....or at least that is what it feels like! He is such a milk monster and a little chunk.
The first two weeks were probably the hardest two weeks of my life! I know people warn you about the cluster feeding, but my god, he was literally attached to my boob all day and all night. He would feed all night, only falling asleep at around 4/5am. I remember the feeling of complete dread when it came to bedtime and I felt physically sick at the idea of feeding him. I was so worried that people would judge me for that but I am so lucky to have an amazingly supportive partner, family and mummy club who reminded me everyday that it was completely normal and it would get better. I can promise you now that it does! When you are in the midst of a night feed, crying over your baby with your milk crusted pj's on, it won't feel like it will ever get better. 11 weeks on and it's all a distant memory that a small part of me misses.
I selfishly love that I am the only person who can provide for him when he's hungry, or if he is really upset and the only thing that will soothe him is mummy's milk. I love our little chats in the middle of the night when nobody else is awake and we have a sleepy snuggle. I love the way he snorts for my boob when it's no longer within his reach because he fell asleep. I love his milk drunk face, when he can't open his eyes properly and he does a cheeky little grin. As hard as it is, and it is fucking hard, I wouldn't change it for the world.
I have asked some other mums to share their experiences, good & bad, as a way to show that not everyone's breastfeeding journey is the same, but that doesn't make it any less special!
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About Rachael
Rachael is a 25 year old girl, currently living in Manchester with her fiancé Aaron, and their gorgeous little boy Teddy who was born in May 2017 along with their two cats Flo & Luna. Rachael loves reading, re-watching series that I've already watched 10 times over, Star Wars, Disney and food. ALLL THE FOOD...
You can find Rachael over at From Rachael Claire
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